August 25, 2023
Ministry Voice

Church Jokes: Clean and Hilarious Jokes for Pastors

Using Religious Jokes and Church Jokes to Enhance Sermons: Our Top Picks for Pastors

Suppose you are looking for jokes for pastors or church jokes. You probably already understand that humor is a powerful tool that, when used correctly, can deeply impact your audience and make it easier for your message to resonate. Incorporating humor into your sermons can create a positive and welcoming atmosphere, making your message more relatable and memorable. However, using humor effectively requires careful consideration and a deep understanding of your congregation. Read below to find some of our favorite jokes for pastors.

What Does The Bible Say About Laughter?

Like the famous saying, “Laughter is the best medicine.” in the Bible, having a joyful and cheerful heart is also good medicine. (Proverbs 17:22)

And throughout the Bible, we can find many Bible passages like Proverbs 17:22 that talk about laughter. With this, here are some bible passages that best define laughter.

  1. Mouths filled with Laughter

Psalm 126:2: “Then our mouth was filled with laughter, and our tongue with shouts of joy; then they said among the nations, ‘The Lord has done great things for them.’”

This passage tells us that after God restored Zion, the Israelites celebrated God’s amazing work with laughter and singing. Thus, we, too, should celebrate God’s goodness in our lives, singing and so much joy that our mouths will be filled with laughter.

  1. A Time to Laugh

Ecclesiastes 3:4 “4 a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,

In this passage, King Solomon tells us there will always be a time for something, including a time for laughter. So, don’t be afraid to laugh out loud when it’s time to enjoy and laugh!

  1. God will fill Job’s mouth with Laughter

Job 8:21 “He will yet fill your mouth with laughter, and your lips with shouting. 

So, his friends have come to comfort him after these losses. And one of Job’s friends reminded him that God will restore his joy. And that even at his lowest point, God is still with him.

Top 15: The Perfect Church Joke for a Heavenly Laugh!

Are you looking for a wholesome laugh? Dive into our collection of the perfect church jokes guaranteed to leave you in stitches! Whether you’re a devout attendee or simply a fan of good, clean humor, our compilation of hilarious church jokes is bound to have something for everyone. But before we share this incredible dose of church humor, we want to emphasize that we aim to spread joy and not to offend or mock anyone’s beliefs or experiences. These jokes are fictional and not based on real-life events or individuals.

With a clear conscience and a happy heart, let’s revel in some high-spirited and hilarious church humor. So sit back, relax, and get ready to laugh with these whimsical tales of church merriment!

  1. The Board Meeting
  2. There will be a meeting of the Church Board immediately after the service,” announced the pastor.

After the close of the service, the Church Board gathered at the back of the sanctuary for the announced meeting. But a stranger was in their midst — a visitor who had never attended their church.

My friend,” said the pastor, “Didn’t you understand that this is a meeting of the Board?”

“Yes,” said the visitor, “and after today’s sermon, I suppose I’m just about as bored as anyone else who came to this meeting.

  1. The Miraculous Cane

Bent over and obviously in pain, the old man with a cane hobbled laboriously through the sanctuary and into the pastor’s office while the choir practiced.

Ten minutes later, he came out, walking upright and moving gracefully and quickly.

Good gracious,” the choir director exclaimed. “Did the pastor heal you by faith?”

“No,” the old man said with a smile. “He just gave me a cane that wasn’t six inches too short!”

  1. He Brews

Early one morning, the husband and wife were arguing over who should get out of the warm bed to make the coffee. Finally, the wife folded her arms and said, “You have to make the coffee. It’s in the Bible!”

The husband was shocked.Is not! Show me!”

Pulling out her Bible, the wife opened it to one of the New Testament books and declared, “It says right here — HEBREWS!”

  1. Creation is Tiring, Too!

God is talking to one of his angels. He says, “Do you know what I have just done? I have just created 24 hours of alternating light and darkness on Earth. Isn’t that good?”

The angel says, “Yes, but what will you do now?”

God says, “I think I’ll call it a day.

  1. The Little Boy

For the first time, a little boy in church watched as the ushers passed around the offering plates. When they came near his pew, the boy said loudly, “Don’t pay for me, Daddy; I’m under five.

  1. Too Soon for Sunday School

During a Sunday school lesson, a child learned how God created human beings. The child became especially focused when the teacher explained how Eve was created from Adam’s ribs. Later in the week, the boy’s mother saw him lying on the floor and asked him what was wrong. His reply was priceless: “Mom, I have a pain in my side—I think I’m getting a wife.”

  1. Awkward Wedding Colors

A little girl finally got to attend a wedding for the first time. While in the church, the girl asked her mother: “Why is the bride dressed in white?” The mother replied to the girl: “Because white is the color of happiness, and it’s the happiest day of her life today.”

After a little bit, the girl looks up at her mother and says: “But then why is the groom wearing black?”

  1. Witty Kindergartener

A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom as the children drew pictures. The teacher would occasionally walk around and see each child’s artwork. As she approached one little girl working especially hard, she asked what the drawing was.

The little girl told her: “I’m drawing God!”

“But sweety,” the teacher replied, “no one knows what God looks like.”

Automatically, the little girl continued drawing and said: “Well, they certainly will in a minute!”

  1. Strange Math

After the wedding, the little ringbearer asked his father, “How many brides can the groom marry?”

“One,” his father said. “Why do you ask?”

“Because the priest said he could marry sixteen,” the boy said, puzzled.

“How’d you come up with that?” his father asked.

“Easy,” the little boy said. “All you have to do is add it up like the priest said: 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer.

  1. Prayer for Hearing

After service, a stranger approached the pastor and said, “I’d like you to pray for my hearing.”

The pastor touched the man’s ears and said a passionate, earnest prayer.

“How’s your hearing now?” the pastor asked.

Surprised, the man said, “Well, it’s not until tomorrow.”

  1. Sunday Fish Tale

A boy came late to Sunday School. Knowing he was usually very prompt, his teacher asked, “Johnny, is anything wrong?”

“No, ma’am, not really,” he said.”I was going to go fishing, but my dad told me that I needed to get on up and go to church.” The teacher was very impressed and asked Johnny if his father had explained why going to church was more important than fishing.

“Yes, ma’am, he did,” Johnny said. “My daddy said he didn’t have enough bait for both of us.

  1. Prayer at Sea

As the storm raged, the captain realized his ship was sinking fast. He called out, “Anyone here knows how to pray?”

A pastor stepped forward. Captain, I know how to pray.”

“Good,” said the captain, “you pray while the rest of us put on our life jackets – we’re one short.

  1. A Pastor’s Power

A pastor was in the middle of his sermon when he noticed a man had fallen asleep with his head on his wife’s shoulder.

“Wake up, your husband,” Pastor Riley snapped.

The wife smiled and replied, “You put him to sleep. You wake him up.

  1. Peter, do you love Me?

It was the week after the resurrection, and disciples were still scattered about Jerusalem and the surrounding villages. John searched high and low for Peter and finally found him hanging out in the upper room. “Peter, Peter!” he said excitedly. “I have good news and bad news. Which would you rather hear first?”

“By all means, give me the good news. We’ve had enough bad news lately,” Peter said.

“The good news is Christ is risen,” John said.

“That’s great!” said Peter. “Now, what’s the bad news?”

John looked around anxiously and said, “Well, He’s steamed about last Friday.”

  1. Mrs.Watson

During her sermon on Jesus’s teaching that we should love our enemies, the pastor asked the congregation to raise their hands if they had enemies. Everyone did so except for Mrs. Watson in the front row, who had just turned 95.

“Mrs. Watson,” the pastor asked, “how could you live for 95 years and have no enemies?”

“That’s easy,” the senior citizen replied, “I just outlived them!”

Dad’ Jokes for Pastors

Ever heard of “Dad jokes”? These classic, one-liner puns, typically delivered by middle-aged or older men, are known for their simplistic and amusing charm.

Well, brace yourself for a delightful twist, as we’ve compiled a list exclusively dedicated to funny church jokes clean enough for the whole family to enjoy! Whether you’re into church humor or simply in the mood for a good, hearty laugh, our collection of short church jokes and religious jokes clean of inappropriate content, is a surefire way to lighten your spirits.

Each joke is a concoction of light-hearted church humor and charming wit, designed to elicit a different kind of laughter and amusement. Whether you find them delightfully dry or whimsically punny, these religious jokes offer a refreshing break from the mundane with a splash of wholesome hilarity.

So, get ready to chuckle, giggle, or even snort as you dive into our compilation of short, clean, and downright funny church jokes!

  1. Why couldn’t Jonah trust the ocean?… He just knew there was something fishy about it.
  2. What kind of cell phone did Delilah use?… Samson
  3. How do we know Peter was a rich fisherman?… By his net income.
  4. Why didn’t Noah ever go fishing?… He only had two worms.
  5. How long did Cain hate his brother? As long as he was Abel, too.
  6. Who was the smartest man in the Bible? Abraham. He knew a Lot.
  7. What kind of person was Boaz before he got married? Ruthless!
  8. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible? Samson. He brought the house down.
  9. Which servant of God was the worst lawbreaker in the Bible? Moses. He broke all ten commandments at once.
  10. At what time of day was Adam created?A little before Eve.
  11. Which Bible character had no parents?… Joshua, son of Nun.
  12. What animal could Noah, not trust?… Cheetah
  13. Who was the straightest man in the Bible?… Joseph: Pharao made him a ruler
  14. Who is the biblical character who likes to drink soft drinks?…HABBA-COKE (Habakkuk)
  15. Where’s the first mention of “laxatives” in the Bible?… In Exodus, the part when “Moses took the tablets and went into the wilderness.”


Have you enjoyed this Article? More helpful articles from us!

  1. Bible-based Sermon Ideas for Pastors
  2. The Importance of Giving
  3. Sermons on Faith
  4. Bible-based Youth Sermon Ideas
  5. Top Bible Verses on Leadership


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